After years of failure, she found a resolution she could keep

Well, January has come and gone. Have you broken your new year’s resolutions yet?

If you’re still sticking with the resolutions you made on Jan. 1, congratulations! If your resolve has flown like a migrating hummingbird, don’t feel bad. You’re not alone — 45 percent of Americans make new year’s resolutions but only 8 percent of these actually achieve their goals.

It’s also good to know that humans have been making resolutions — and probably, just like us, breaking them — for thousands of years. The Babylonians made promises at the start of every year to return borrowed objects and pay debts. The Romans made promises to the god Janus (hence ‘January’) when the new year rolled around.

The most popular resolutions won’t surprise anyone. Losing weight is right up there, but so are volunteering, quitting smoking, saving money, getting a better job and reducing alcohol intake.

In the spirit of full transparency, I’m a resolution failure from way back. For as long as I can remember, my goals have been lofty and utterly unattainable by me. It was usually something like giving up chocolate or ice cream. The first bad day and my will would vanish with the quart of Jamoca Almond Fudge I inhaled while sitting on the couch. Of course I always had the weight loss resolution, cloaked in the guise of “exercise more,” but I’d usually answer the siren call of my fluffy bathrobe, instead.

New type of resolution

Gradually, I just stopped making resolutions. Until last year. Last year, I resolved to be a better friend and a better boss.

Now, it’s not as if I’m a bad friend or an overbearing and unsympathetic boss. But with job pressures, family commitments and home responsibilities, most times I’d just want to flee the office for the comfortable confines of my couch. It seemed it was either too inconvenient or I was too tired to take the time to engage with others.

So I made my resolutions and I started small. As a supervisor, I wanted something I could do for everyone on my team, and it had to be easy to accomplish. I didn’t want to pick something overwhelming or so difficult that I would stop or get discouraged easily. That would be even worse than not starting at all, in my book.

I decided to remember my co-workers on their birthdays. A small enough thing; maybe just an email or an e-card, I wasn’t sure. I marked my Outlook calendar a week in advance of every birthday. When I found myself in the card section of a store in the mall, I stocked up on greeting cards — enough for the entire year. I also bought small, humorous gifts to share.

Next step: being a better friend. I decided to make some time in my schedule, no matter what. I went out of my way to accept lunch or dinner invitations from friends. Instead of just saying “I’m so busy” or “You know, we really should get together” I would say “I’m free this week, are you?”

Result: More fun

What happened? I ended up having fun. I reconnected with friends I hadn’t seen in years, including a girls high school reunion retreat where we talked late into the night and shared stories of love, loss and accomplishments. I had lunch dates with co-workers and friends, finding a new support network both at the office and outside. My co-workers appreciated not only the email I sent on their special day, but the cards and humorous gifts were a hit.

At the end of last year, I gave myself a high five for having stuck with my resolution for the whole year. And having that first taste of success, I was ready and raring to go for this year.

This year, I added three resolutions: Getting to bed by 10 p.m. (night owl that I am, I usually can’t go to bed without the nightly news!), exercising more and drinking more water.

So, how am I doing? Well, I’m getting to bed by 10 p.m., at least. I still haven’t actually stopped watching the nightly news from bed, but I am ‘in bed.’ Exercising more? Well, not yet. I got one of those wrist fitness bands for the holidays and while I have yet to become a slave to it, I will periodically glance at it and decide I need to step away from my desk and perambulate around the office cubicles. Drinking more water? Well, that’s the big one for me. I’ve stopped drinking my morning tea — usually just a vehicle for lots of sugar — and replaced it with water. I’ve also replaced the nightly high-octane, highly caffeinated dinner soda with water.

Already, I’ve noticed that I feel better and maybe, with a little luck, that also might help me lose some of the holiday weight I gained!

So, bottom line: Don’t feel discouraged if you can’t keep a resolution. Remember, you’re not alone! But if you start small, make a plan you can implement easily and start over again if you fall off the wagon, by the end of the year you may find that you’ve been successful. And I’ll drink to that! Water, of course!